In her role as a therapist, she helps permanent managing conservatorship youth, foster, adopt, and kinship youth navigate through their feelings about placement, loss, grief, identity, and trauma. And in doing so, something interesting happened. As she incorporated family therapy and began meeting with birth children, she learned that many of them have personal or practical needs that were often overlooked.
And no, it’s not coffee, but it’s just as hot! Dr. Annette Williams, a Licensed Professional Counselor and Program Manager for Arms Wide has worked with families and children for more than 30 years.
As Dr. Williams listened, she identified a theme. Concerns were expressed about not agreeing to placements: helping their parents fulfill a dream or a calling. Many reported being angry and frustrated about the behaviors of their foster/adopted siblings. Some shared feeling displaced, being pushed aside as their parents focused on the needs of their newly placed children.
There were also discussions about the differences in perceived parenting styles. For instance, birth children reported that rules and expectations for themselves were vastly different from their foster/adopted counterparts, and unanimously shared, “I could have never gotten away with the stuff my foster/adopted siblings got away with. The expectations were different for me.”
It is these perceived differences that have shaped the hearts and minds of many birth children.
As Dr. Williams searched for support materials to work with birth children in this regard, her efforts proved fruitless. Thus, she created a curriculum inclusive of worksheets, games, and bonding activities to meet the needs of this population.
So, here is the brew! Beginning in January 2025, Dr. Williams, and Arms Wide will roll out Phase 1 of the Through Their Eyes: A Birth Child’s Perspective on Foster Care and Adoption curriculum.
Phase 1 of the roll out includes three focus groups; one for youth 6 to 17 years, a second for adult birth children 18 years and older and the third focus group is for the parents of the birth children. Focus groups will garner feedback from participants to support perfecting the curriculum and meeting various needs.
Phase 2 of the roll out includes (6) 4-hour workshops covering adverse childhood experiences, dual parenting roles, communications, trauma, self-awareness, and a child/parent bonding activity. Following the workshops, families benefit from 3 to 6 months of aftercare including monthly check-ins and access to therapy if needed.
But the brew does not stop here!
To continue meeting the needs of families, Dr. Williams developed Blend Den which focuses on the needs of blended families. Course work addresses traditional blended families as well as non-traditional families inclusive of foster, adopted and kinship youth, transracial placements, and natural family members.
A Common Bond focuses on former foster/adopted/kinship youth who are now adults and over the age of thirty. This one-day workshop brings these individuals together to share their placement journeys and life as it is at the present. Participants benefit from practical skills and techniques, in which they build strong communities through various platforms including YouTube, book writing, podcasts and more. The goal is to assist in bringing forth sensitive topics, problem share, and creating solutions collaboratively.
My Placement Is Floundering is a one-day workshop which is designed to help adoptive/resource parents, and kinship caregivers identify signs of distress, extreme behavioral issues in children, a lack of positive interaction between children and their caregiver(s), and when a caregiver is unable to manage the child’s needs and safety concerns.
When Families Fall Apart: Foster/Adopt/Kinship Families Workshop is one-day designed to support caregivers and resource parents when youth are separated from the home. Coursework covers communicating with others including the child, using resources and support services, collaborating with others, emotional wellness, loss, grief, and the legal implications of disruption and relinquishment.
When Families Fall Apart is followed by, It’s A Family Thing: Creating Tabletop Games and Virtual Games About Family.
Workshops continue with themed marriage retreats, mom and dad spa days, and working with blended military families.
Focus groups for region 6 (Houston) begin January 25, 2025. Focus groups for region 11 (South Texas) begin February 1, 2025. The pilot begins in March 2025.
If you are interested in learning more about our brew, contact Dr. Annette Williams at awilliams@armswide.org.